Something clicked yesterday and I got a little excited. 

It started with a post by Tim Ferris about people losing 100+ pounds on his 'slow carb' protocol. It was an inspiring read so I went back to my '4 hour body' book and reread the slow carb chapter. 

The plan just has a few simple most of which didn't phase me. A few though brought up some interesting thoughts:

Rule one: don't eat anything white... This isn't really a surprise rule for me. Low carb and paleo both also have this rule. No wheat, rice, sugar, potatoes etc. and though I've tried - cause I know this is how I best lose weight. I've had real issue with compliance.  As soon as I think about giving something up 100% my wild child and feast beast start making all kinds of noise!

but...there is rule 5: take one day off and go nuts!  Asy feast beast starts to go through the list of 'forbidden foods' that we 'can't live without'. I fall back of the free day. "we can have those things on Saturday" I tell it. And it starts to calm down. Like magic!

Of corse then my dictator starts to snap it's whip and get noisy. "Free days wiill slow your progress". She yells. "You have to be more strict!"  

But then a thought comes to me and I remind her that with no free days I've haven't been compliant at all, and that has got me losing 0 pounds. In fact I've even been GAINING weight.  So how could a free day be any worse then that!  

The dictator seems to have accepted that and that has me excited and feeling hopeful. 

On the exercise front. I didn't get to the gym yesterday morning, but I did finally go for a run. I found a training plan for couch to 10k that I really like and I started last night. The run was 1 minute run/2 minute walk repeated 8 times. I managed to run/walk almost 2 miles in less then 35 minutes. That's pretty good for a 270 lb woman if you ask me. I also tried the "7 minutes in hell" workout from the carrot iPhone ap (I'll have to talk about that more later) and it was fun and quite the workout. Pointed out how out of shape (and heavy) I am. Body weight exercises were tougher then any weight training I've done recently. 

So I woke up this morning with a plan and feeling positive. That hasn't happened in a long long time. 

I've been trying to tracky cravings a little closer of late. Trying to figure out when I'm at my weakest. When (and why) I binge. Although I don't have all the answers yet I have found that getting in my car to drive somewhere (anywhere) makes me think about food. Maybe it's just habit - but I really need to figure this out. Considering I spend a LOT of hours in my car -alone- it could have a lot to do with my weight gain over the past few years. I minute I get in my car and turn it on my Brian starts thinking about where on the way I can stop and get food. It doesn't matter if I just ate something either. Then when I do stop I tend to get into that 'Last Supper' mentality. I stopped this time, but I'm never doing this again so I better eat EVERYTHING I can get my hands on. Im guessing you can see why this would be a problem. 

I think if I can figure this out and break this one habit it'll go a long way to helping me win the food battle. And I'll finally be on my way to losing some weight. 

So, yeah...

Where am I?

Still at the heaviest of my life... new 'heaviest' was this Monday - almost 270.

The longest I seem to be able to stay on a diet plan is three days, but honestly just sticking 24 hours is a struggle.

None of the diets, or non-diets I've tried/am trying seem to be 'the one'.  I have to believe that there is 'one' out there that will work.  There has to be!

This week I'm not really working inside any rules per se, but thinking a lot.  Or maybe even just thinking about thinking about it - but that's a step.

I gave myself a goal to blog more. Maybe this will help me work through this slump.  Blogging + momentum seem to have gone hand in hand in the past, though I suspect it's more about 'blogging when I'm on a roll' then 'blogging is causing me to be on a roll'.  But hey, I'm willing to give anything a shot at this point.