Monday, January 30, 2006




ColorQuiz.comShawn took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test!

"Longs for a tender and sympathetic bond and for a ..."


Click here to read the rest of the results.


Well last week turned out interesting...

Wednesday I woke up and discovered I couldn't walk across the room. I was so dizzy that even while lying down it felt like I was on a merry go round.

By Thursday I thought I felt better - took the day off from exercise just in case.

Friday the BLEHS were back. No dizziness but a headache and complete exhaustion. I took a bad thing and made it worse by not eating properly.

Saturday, again with the blahs. I at least was back 'on the wagon' with food. No problems there.

Sunday - well thank God it was a free day.

Today - well I think I have an idea of what's going on at least. I'm thinking sinus infection, perhaps edging toward ear infection? What's bothering me more then anything is the total exhaustion. I got up at 4:00 this morning, got my gym clothes on and actually packed my car and turned it on. I was shaking and felt sick to my stomach I was SO TIRED! So I turned off the car and went back in and went to bed. Ended up sleeping until 7:00!! I drove myself to the Ferry and then took a 30 minute nap while on there. Even then when I got to work all I've wanted to do all morning is lay my head on the keyboard and go back to sleep. Even after popping two aliev I've got a headache behind my eyes and I'm having trouble focusing on the screen.

BUT - I have done some things right today. Last night I planned all my meals for the day and I've got them packed and sitting in the fridge. No temping myself by going to the store for lunch when I'm feeling vulnerable.

As for a workout. I don't see a heavy leg day in my future - a thought that makes me VERY sad. But I will do something!! even if it's just a 30 minute walk on the treadmill. I will end this string of yellows and do what I can. I've got a bad attitude I suppose. If I can't give 100% I feel like I shouldn't even bother. THAT's not going to get me anywhere.

I've got two more days in January - I'll recap the month on the first. I'm looking forward to February. I've got some small changes in mind that just might get this body of mine to start giving me the results I want...

I did two things last night - 1 I downloaded Diet Power to try a for a few days. I LOVE my fitday PC but I want to see how Diet Power does tracking my metabolism.

I also ordered a set of motivational CD's from Susan Powter. Say what you will about the woman but she's lost 133 lbs and KEPT it off for YEARS now. Personally I love her motivational style and her 'Don't be stupid' attitude. One of my favorite lines of hers is 'There is no motivational Fairy'. You can bet that I'll be checking my mail every day with eager anticipation until they come. I'm going to rip the CD's and dump them onto an MP3 player so I can listen while I run and while I ride the ferry. I also should be getting 'The Thin Commandments' on CD soon. Maybe those voices in my ears will help to battle the voices in my head.

I know it sounds like a cop out, but my self esteem has really been taking a battering of late and it's made it a constant battle to do right by myself. I need to call in a few reinforcements.

And that's my plan! ;)

Friday, January 27, 2006

For your Friday Viewing pleasure




Edit: since we have known each other my fiance and I have at various times had that song stuck in our heads and could not figure out where it was from. Then a few weeks ago I mentioned it to a friend of mine and she had the answer - the muppet show! So yesterday I did a search and there it was on google vidio!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3783432027460701715

google video will give you code to post the video to your site :)

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Feeling MUCH better today. No dizzyness.

I almost wonder if yesterday wasn't caused by some sort of 'lack of sleep' or something because today it feels just about like nothing was wrong.

Of course that's probably the alergy aspect of it.

Still - just to be safe I slept in and didn't plan any workouts. I am however back at work. Not that that's anything to celebrate :P

BUT food should be no problem. Hope everyone has a GREAT day.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Afternoon – not much to report today. I woke up and was half way across the room this morning when I noticed the room was spinning and I need to grab onto something or fall over. I tried to ignore it but it was still there after getting dressed. I finally acknowledged that I was in not shape to drive so I went back to bed. I finally got up at 10:30. I'm not dizzy anymore but my nose is congested and my ears hurt. BAH! I'll be popping some Vit C for the rest of the day and probably taking some decongestants.

I should have realized last night when I got home and I wasn't hungry that something 'wasn't right'. That never happens to me.

Anyway – having no problem sticking to a food plan today. Just won't get a workout in probably.

I hope everyone has a great day.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

I’ve got a meeting in just a few so I’ll have to give you the cliff notes version today.

Yesterday ended fine – food was on track.

Didn’t want to get up today (what’s new?) I even hit snooze three times. The worse was that the fiancé wasn’t going to the gym this morning. That meant I had to do it ALL on my own. I did get up. Got my things together and made it. I had a run planned but just did NOT feel like it. For once I wasn’t up to fighting myself. It’ll have to happen tonight.

I did ROCK the weight room though. It’s chest day and I had a twelve week goal to press 80 lbs (plus the bar) for 10 reps. Well I’ve been working with my spotter and have hit that 80 lbs for 10 reps a few times but he’s always been ‘helping’. Today I lined up under the bar and went for it! No safety net – nothing! I wanted to do a happy dance when I gutted out 10 perfect reps! I swear I was grinning ear to ear.

THEN because I’m just a glutton like that – I added 5 lbs and did two more sets of 6 reps at 85!

Bench Press: 80 x 10 / 85 x 6 / 85 x 6

Next was dumbbell presses – again I’ve set myself a goal - Fifty pounds for 10 reps. I’m not nearly as close on this one – but then I always do dumbbell presses AFTER fatiguing the crap out of myself with the barbell presses – so maybe I’m closer then I think? Anyway – I did do 50 lbs it was HARD, but I did it.

DB Bench Press: 50 x 6 / 50 x 6 / 50 x 5

The rest of the workout was pretty typical

Decline Press (+ bar): 60 x 6

Cable Crunches: 195 x 15 / 195 x 15 / 195 x 15

And that’s that!

Oh wait – one more thing.



Monday, January 23, 2006

Almost forgot...

Plan for this week:

Monday - Legs (Done)
Tuesday - Chest/Abs 2.25 mile run
Wednesday - Back
Thursday - Shoulders/Tris - 1.5 mile run
Friday - Bis/Abs
Saturday - 2.25 mile run

6 miles of running this week and then I'll back down - It'll be cool to see what my new 1.5 mile times are.
It’s been a bit since I’ve updated. But don’t worry it’s simply because I’m busy not because I’m avoiding posting!

Friday – oh Friday. I slept in on Friday because I knew we had the weekend to ourselves and would be able to hit the gym then. I tell you, there are some days when sleeping in feels Soooo good!

The nutrition got a little shaky around lunch time. I over did it a bit, but pulled it out at dinner. The outlook on the fiancé’s job is not as good as we firsts thought and that put me into a bit of a tailspin. I need to learn how to deal with this stuff in other ways.

Saturday we had made plans to hike the dip-sea trail. It’s a challenging hike. Every year in June they have a race along it and I’ve thought about joining. I’ve wanted to hike at least once before signing up though and I thought Saturday we were going to get our chance. As we woke up Saturday morning, though, it was to the unmistakable sound of rain. Ugh! Hiking was out of the question of course.

Instead we got dressed, had some breakfast, hit a few shops (I got some more new clothes YAY) and then hit the gym.

It was nice and quiet and not very crowded. We had an awesome workout!

Back:

Bent Rows (+Bar): 60 x 6 / 60 x 6 / 60 x 6
Close Grip Lat Pull downs: 110 x 6 / 115 x 6
Assisted Pull-ups: 160 x 10 / 160 x 6
Seated Row: 120 x 6

Olympic Style Deadlifts (total weight): 90 x 6 / 135 x 4
Shrugs : 50 x 6

Bis:

Straight Bar Curls: 50 x 6/50 x 6 / 50 x 6
Hammer Curls: 20 x 6 / 25 x 6
EZ-Curl Bar: 55 x 5 / 55 x 4

Abs:
Hanging Leg Lifts: 15 / 14

I spent the rest of the day figuring out a new processes for tracking my workouts. I had found that I would raise a weight and then forget and start at the same ol’ weight the next time through. So, I’ve starting using a program that lets me set up templates and then print my workouts. It also prints nice graphs and will show my progress. I’m looking forward to seeing how things progress.

Sunday I got out of bed KNOWING I was going to get my run done. We had pondered going on our hike yesterday but the sun hadn’t shone much and we didn’t want to get stuck slogging through the mud.

As soon as I got out of bed I changed into my workout clothes, laced on my shoes and headed out the door. I had already measured and mapped out a course so I had a good idea of where I was going. I made sure I had plenty of shoulder to run on and didn’t have to use sidewalks.

It was a beautiful day and I felt GREAT going out. I hit the 10 minute mark just about the time I finished the first mile!

One thing about running outside, it is VERY different then running on the treadmill. Not just the ‘effort’ factor either. I use the treadmill to PUSH myself a lot of the times, but I also use it to hold myself back. It forces me to run a steady pace. Outside though there’s nothing like that. I just GO – it’s really nice.

Running is still not ‘easy’ for me. There are times I get wrapped up in my thoughts and I forget that I’m even running, but it doesn’t last long. Before I know it I’m going ‘hey! I’m in the zone – but THINKING about being in the zone tends to put you OUT of the zone so then I’m back to thinking about how my right shin hurts and how my lungs are on fire.

I turned around and started the ‘back’ part of my out-and-back run. That’s when things got REALLY hard. The rout I had chose had a slight ‘grade’ to in and when I turned around I was suddenly headed UP hill. I also discovered that I was now running into a headwind. Only it wasn’t consistently a headwind sometimes it shifted and was hitting me at about a 30% angle instead. Not FUN. But, I put my head into the wind and kept pushing. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I kept fighting the urge to drop into the shuffling walk/run that I have and instead pick of my feet and at least give the appearance of a ‘real’ runner. I was too exhausted to be proud when I hit the door at home. 2 miles – 24:30 minutes.

I celebrated by picking up a new pair of running shoes – I can’t wait to try them tomorrow.

This morning it was business as usual. Up at 4:00AM and at the gym at the usual time.

Leg day – whoop!

Squats (+ bar): 160 x 6 / 160 x 6 / 160 x 6
Leg Press: 540 x 6 / 540 x 6
Dead Lift (+ bar): 120 x 6 / 120 x 6
Standing Calf: 195 x 8 / 195 x 8 / 195 x 7
Seated Calf: 135 x 8 / 135 x 6

Food is on plan. I’m doing ‘only green’ carbs for my last three meals for the day. We’ll how that effects my numbers at the end of the week.

I’m looking forward to the end of next week and our four week checkin!

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Matt, I have to admit – yesterday I let you down :)

My ‘partial’ excuse was that I wasn’t feeling good. The headache stayed with me all day and by evening I was wheezing and coughing. After work when my fiancé showed up – we were both invited out with ‘the guys’ from work. We went. My nutrition for the day was ‘spotty’ and was completely blown by me indulging in a drink at the bar. Then when we finally ate dinner I gave into the craving for a juicy hamburger AND fries.

But that’s done and over with. The good news is today I woke up headache free for the first time in about a week. Yay! Maybe I needed that red meat protein? Who knows.

When the alarm went off this morning I toddle off to do my morning constitutional and yes, the thought of going back to bed DID cross my mind, but when I got back to the bedroom the fiancé had already gotten out of bed AND turned on the light. We were committed. Whew!

We actually managed to get out of the house in really good time and were at the gym about 5 minutes earlier then normal. That was nice because it gave me time to get in a really nice long workout.

I started with my run. The goal was 1.5 miles. I was worried about how I was going to feel during my run because I had had so many problems breathing last night. After a two minute warm up I set it to my 5MPR pace and started to go. The first 10 minutes just WIZZED by! I knew at that moment that all the hard work I’ve been putting into my running was paying off. When I dropped down the speed for my first walk break I only dropped it to 3.5 instead of my normal 3MPR and then only ‘rested’ one minute instead of two before cranking it back up to 5MPR. I had a new goal, finish the 1.5miles in less then 19 minutes. As is my habit I really pushed the last .25 mile. Even so I was still feeling great when I hit that 1.5Mile mark! And that feeling got even better when I looked down and saw I had finished in 18.31 minutes! YAY!

I didn’t have long to celebrate though because soon it was time for shoulders and Tris.

Arnold Press: 35 x 6 / 35 x 3 / 30 x 6

I’m at a problem time right now on the Arnold Presses – 30’s are way easy and 35’s MAN are they hard. I think I’m just going to have to keep doing as many with the 35’s as I can and finishing up with 30’s

Military Barbell Presses (+bar): 50 x 6 / 50 x 6

This was REALLY hard – probably because I did Arnold Presses first. Fiancé was doing a LOT of spotting towards the end of the last set.

Side Lateral Raises: 20 x 6

Triceps Cable Pushdowns: 105 x 6 / 115 x 6 / 115 x 6

Overhead Cable Extensions: 55 x 6 / 55 x 6

Bench Dips: 6

I’m going to raise my feet the next I do these. I have to say doing these was a HUGE victory for me. A few months ago I tried doing dips and the only way I could do them was to bend my knees (so it almost looked like I was sitting in a chair) and support much of my weight with my legs – I did them EASILY this time with my legs completely straight.

I’m back on track with eating today and the workout is done and taken care off. I see another strong day going into the books and that little *blip* from yesterday is over and done with.

And I got this quote in my email today.

"Gradual change is usually more fruitful in the long run than
is forced, ultra-aggressive upheaval. Undertaken wisely, steady
transitions cultivate authenticity, groundedness, and virtues–like
patience, compassion (for self and others), and perseverance."

*Unknown

Great advice – I still may end up throwing a lot of the ‘wheat’ carbs out of my diet.

Thanks to everyone for your comments on the ‘loss’ in my photos. I know the scale shouldn’t rule our lives and yes I’m happy for the changes I’ve been seeing – BUT, losing scale weight IS important to me for more then vain reasons. Carrying around 200+ lbs is not easy on my joints and feet, especially when I run. It’s not easy on my heart either. I MAY think about avoiding it for a longer length of time – like a month or so. But that makes it hard to know if the diet needs tweaking. We’ll see. I’ll try to refrain from complaining about it too much though. If I’m going to continue to get on the silly thing I should be willing to accept that it’s not always going to tell me what I want to hear.

Back to work now – Have a GREAT day!

Edit: Today's Pace 1.5 miles in 18:31 at 12:20 mins/ mile

WHOOP!!!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

It didn't happen this morning.

I think I'm battling a cold or something because I've been fighting greater then usual body aches, a sore throat and headaches all week.

But – all is not lost. Fiancé is driving into the city tonight and we’re going to go to the gym next to work. I’ll hit shoulders then – fun! Plus I get to show him the fancy dancy gym they have here. They have a hot tub and everything.

Other then that… food is excellent, motivation is high. I just need a nice long nap at this point and I think I would be 100%.

The interview for that job I talked about last week is TODAY. Man I hope this works out!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

You know, standing in the rain in a skirt at 7:00PM when it's 50 degrees outside and the wind is blowing the rain sideways is the perfect time for a pitty party. It's a good thing I was stranded there, waiting for the fiance to pick me up or I would have fallen face first into, something, ANYTHING.

I've tried to gloss over it, not dwell on it BUT this lack of progress is really getting to me. No no I'm not giving up - just voicing some frustration. I'm tired, cold, have a headache and my body aches from head to toe. You think fate could throw me a frickin' bone and give me SOME hope that I'm doing something right here?

Ok, ok.. I'm sorry, I'm done.

If anyone has ever doubted the power of muscle.. heheh the check this out.







according to the scale - I weigh the exact same amount in all three of these photos
Just a quick one – Work is going to get busier and busier for me so my posts may be a little thin.

Update on stats:




That’s 203.7 lbs. 1.1 lbs in two weeks.

That means I need to do a bit more tweaking on the diet. I hate this…

On a positive note – I got up and worked out this morning.

Funny – I was dreading my run this morning. Since last night even, but I jumped on the treadmill as soon as I got to the gym. Amazingly it wasn’t that bad! The first 10 minutes were really easy – When I started the second 10 minutes I started to argue with myself a bit but I fooled myself into keeping going with ‘Just make it to minute 15…’ and then ‘awww you can make it to minute 20 now!’ and I did! What really amazed me is I had set a ‘Wouldn’t it be nice’ goal of finishing my 2 miles in 25 minutes AND to my amazement I was done in EXACTLY 25 minutes. WHOOP!

Then it was off to the weight room for chest:

Barbell Bench Press (+Bar): 80 x 10 (that’s right – I hit my goal of 80lbs x 10 reps… BUT I had a spotter and I suspect he was REALLY helping out at the end – I hope to finish with NO HANDS on the bar but mine by the end of all this). 80 x 6 / 80 x 6

Dumbbell Bench Press: 45 x 10 / 45 x 6

Dumbbell Flyes: 30 x 6 / 30 x 6

Lastly I staggered over to the cable pull down and did two sets of Abs

Cable Crunches: 195 x 15 / 195 x 15

I was exhausted and DOMS was starting to hit from yesterday’s workout. I told my fiancé I was headed to the locker room to pass out. He just smiled and told me not to hurt myself.

So – I’m feeling great now. Ok sore but GREAT. I ran 2 miles this morning whoop!

Monday, January 16, 2006

I DID it!

I just got back from the gym. There were some obstacles some physical, some mental but I DID it!

One, believe it or not I’m very self conscious – well, I don’t know if that’s the word for it. I worry/stress about new situations. If I let myself I’ll worry about what others will think about me. Actually, it’s more that I HATE to make mistakes and I worry that when I’m in a new situation, that I might do something that’s a mistake. First impressions mean a lot to me – I’m just wired that way. Once I’ve made a first impression, yeah I don’t like making mistakes but I’m less worried about putting myself out there. I figure I’ve set the foundation and a little set back now and then won’t tarnish (too much) the persona I would like to project.

Hopefully this is correctly leading up to the point that I was going to set foot into a new gym. One I was unfamiliar with filled with people who were going to be seeing me for the first time. And I was stressing out about it. Enough to actually entertain the thought of not going.

THEN I realized that I hadn’t brought a bath towel with me. But, the part of me that cringes every time I have to post about missing a workout had had enough. Before those little negative thoughts could worm themselves too deeply into my brain, I realized how ridiculous my fears were. Really – what were people going to do – take a look at me and chase me from the gym with pitchforks? Yeah my body might not be perfect but heck that’s why I’m at the gym! As for making mistakes; I know what I’m doing in the weight room and if anyone thinks differently. That’s their problem not mine.

As for the towel, well, there’s a Walgreen’s on the way to the gym and lo and behold, THEY carry gym worthy bath towels for a mere $5.99 each (or two for $10).

So I made it and even though I showed up in shorts and a tank top, no one threw things at me, or ran screaming from the weight room.

As I said it’s a new gym. I had a little trouble finding the locker room. Don’t ask me why I thought I looked like less a fool wandering around looking for signs then simply asking for directions. Sometimes my brain short circuits like that. I eventually found the locker room and then the ‘free weight room’. Score one point for this gym. The free weight room is in the basement. ALL by itself (and with it’s own set of locker rooms I found out later – duh.) The equipment was beautiful and there was PLEANTY of mirror to go around. Unlike my normal gym there was a nice piece of mirror in front of the squat rack – Nice.

Anyway – after I got done salivating on how nice the weight room was I got to work. A few warm up sets and I was ready to go.

Squats (+bar): 140 x 6 / 150 x 6 / 150 x 6

The leg press that was like the one I normally use was in use so I grabbed a leg press machine that I had never tried before. The timid mousy part of me wanted to go ‘lite’. I mean, how embarrassing to have everyone watch you spend five minute loading on plates, then sit down to lift them and have to get up and unload them. I could already hear them (the guys cause there were no woman in the room) snickering. BUT I didn’t do it. I loaded up my normal amount, sat down pressed and whoo hoo the weight lifted! I unlocked the supports, lowered the weight (full range of motion) and went – OOH SHIT! Ummm that was heavy. BUT I managed to push it back and even did it five more times! That was SO AWSOME! I think that ‘sled’ part of this leg press machine is heavier then the normal one I use. I can’t really explain the difference but it LOOKS a whole lot heavier. Next time I do legs at my gym I’m going to add 50lbs cause I think I could press it on my normal machine.

Leg Press: 500 x 6 / 500 x 6

Straight Leg Dead Lift: 110 x 6 / 120 x 6

Calf Raises: 90 x 6 / 120 x 6 / 120 x 6

When I was done I certainly felt rubber legged. It was awesome. Then I remember that I was in a basement and had to walk up two flights of stairs to get to the locker room. ACK! I managed that – it wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. Actually it wasn’t as hard as walking DOWN a flight to get back to street level when I was done.

But I DID it! And I’m Soooo happy that I did!
I have to admit, I’ve very disappointed in myself right now. I didn’t run over the weekend despite the BEAUTIFUL weather we had on Sunday. As I was driving in the car to take the kids shopping the thought ran through my head, “I should be running right now.”

But it didn’t happen. No reason really – just getting wrapped up in other things and general laziness. I’m not going to beat myself up over it, but I do need to LEARN from it. What’s going to change? Weekend exercise needs to happen first thing. Then I don’t have this hanging cloud of guilt over my head the entire weekend. That horrible feeling that “I should be doing something else right now.”

What’s frustrating is I was so motivated Friday. Friday night I had been looking at photos of some really fit women and I left work with this amazing BURNING desire to be ‘just like that’. Sometimes I wonder where that feeling goes. If I could just hold onto it… But life steps in and other things take my attention.

I did take care of some other items that have been on my ‘to-do’ list for ages though. Things like updating MS-Money and my budget – paying up the bills, etc. That felt good.

I didn’t hit the gym this morning either. The alarm went off at 4:00AM, I hit snooze and didn’t wake up again until 5:00. What I AM going to be able to do is go at lunch. I packed my bag and brought it with me. YAY. I do need to figure out this oversleeping thing though. I’m going to have to set a second alarm or something.

It didn’t help that my honey has the day off today and didn’t have to get up. If I haven’t made it clear before I’m going to now – I could NEVER do what I’m doing without him. He’s my support, my motivation and my ‘getter out of bedder’.

Food, however, has been right on plan. The only deviation is I took my free day on Saturday instead of Sunday. That had to do with the food that we had planned to have while the kids were over. I have to say that by the end of the day Saturday I was feeling REALLY good. I felt full up to the tip top and had a bit of nearly everything I had been wanting throughout the week. Overall though it was still a sane day. I’m happy with that.

The plan for the rest of this week

Mon: Legs - 1500 Calories
Tues: Chest/Abs, Run 2 miles – 1700 Calories
Wed: Back – 1900 Calories
Thur: Shoulders, Run 1.5 miles – 1700 Calories
Fri: Biceps/Abs – 1800 Calories
Sat: Run 2 miles – 1700 Calories
Sun: Rest – 2700 Calories

I’ll have to update my progress tomorrow though as I didn’t hit the gym and weigh in today.

Have a good day everyone!

Friday, January 13, 2006

When life hands you lemons – make bitter faces…

I’m kidding!! Yesterday morning my fiancé let me know that he was going to have to work late.

How late?

8:00PM late – yuck!

Visions of missing yet another workout flashed through my head. But then he offered to come pick me up at the ferry, drop me off at the gym and go back to work.

Let me tell you, the temptation to say, “No, don’t bother,” flashed through my mind SEVERAL times. But, eventually I talked myself into going. I ended up missing my ‘night’ ferry though, doing things at work and had to take the next one which put me into my ‘port’ at 6:20. My fiancé picked me up and then announced his good news. By delaying a little I had given him the time to do a few extra things and they had let him go for the day instead of keeping him until 8:00PM – YAY!

When I stepped inside the gym though, it was all I could do not to back out the door and say “No WAY!” Every single dingle cardio machine was full, and the weight room? Well maybe you have, but I’ve never seen so many MEAT HEADS in one place in my life. I’m not talking about the nice guys who are interested in having a great body and word hard for it. I’m talking about the DORKS who’s only intent is to lift more then the guy next to him while preening in front of the mirror and then slamming the weights to the floor as hard as he can so everyone knows he just lifting the equivalent of a car. THEN walk around the gym for 10 minutes talking smack to all the other meat heads, being sure to drop the “F” Bomb as many times as many times as possible.

I was so disgusted!

Add on top of that the five or so people who are there to see how many numbers they can get. The fiancé and I are trying to do shoulders and he needs the 35lb dumbbells. This knuckle head (he’s not a meat head because he didn’t have enough muscle to be one) is sitting with a pair of 35’s AND a 25 next to him while he sits and chats with the girl next to him. He even has the gall to get up and follow her over to the water fountain and when my fiancé stops him while he’s walking away to see if he could use the 35’s he says, “Only one set, right?”

We could have done three in the time the guy sat there and gabbed. When my fiancé was done another guy came over ALSO needing the 35’s. My fiancé pointed out Mr Romeo and said – I was just borrowing them from him. You’re welcome to them as far as I’m concerned.

GAAAAAAAAAH!

Despite all that we managed a decent workout albeit a little weird as we had to workaround the people waiting in line for equipment.

Back:
Seated Rows: 120 x 6 / 120 x 6 / 120 x 6
Bent Rows (+ bar): 50 x 6 / 60 x 6
Lat Pulldown: 120 x 6 / 120 x 6

Shoulders:
Military Press (+Bar): 50 x 6 / 50 x 6 / 50 x 6
Arnold Press: 25 x 6 / 30 x 6 (should have done 35’s but _I_ got sick of waiting for them and just did thirties instead)
Side Raises: 20 x 6 / 20 x 6t

By the time we were finished I swore to NEVER sleep in again because I could not handle going through another workout like that one.

I didn’t run because frankly I couldn’t stand to be in the place a moment longer.

After all of that we still made it home be 9:00 which was kind of amazing. I had my last meal for the day and finished THAT off perfectly. The only downer being – I was so charged up from working out – you could forget about falling asleep. I laid in the dark from 9:30 to about 1:00 before finally drifting completely off. Ugh!

Needless to say 4:00AM came REALLY early. Luckily, because of my schedule I allowed myself to sleep a bit longer cause I wasn’t going to catch the ferry but was driving into work instead.

We ended up hitting the gym by 5:30.

I was thinking that I would run tonight because I have a few hours to kill before I can go home while I wait for the ex to meet me and exchange the kids. So after warming up I headed right over to the weight area to do Bi’s and Tri’s

Straight Bar Curl: 50 x 6 / 50 x 6 / 50 x 6
Alt Dumbbell Curl: 20 x 6 / 25 x 6
Cable Curl: 80 x 6 / 80 x 6

Tri Pushdowns: 100 x 6 / 110 x 6 / 110 x 6
Bent over Tri Extensions: 60 x 6 / 50 x 6
Dip Machine: 165 x 6 / 195 x 6

To my surprise I was done with arms and still had 30 minutes left – so I jumped on a treadmill and did my run.

I still can’t believe hard it is to run those first few minutes. I literally have to talk myself into keeping going and not backing the speed down. It frustrates me. But, I didn’t give in and kept my 5MPR pace almost the entire time! I ended up running my 1.5 miles in 18.58 minutes – a new record! Whoop! (yes I know I’m slow – just humor me) This brings me up from my slowest pace of 13:28 to today’s pace of 12:38 - Since Jan 1st.

That means I’ve done all my weight workouts for the week and all I have left for the weekend is a 1.75 mile run. I SOOOO hope that the weather is nice this weekend so I can run outside.

Last night driving home it was beautiful. An (almost) full moon and clear skies, and it was almost 50 degrees. The only thing that kept me from jumping out of the car and running part of the way home is that I was wearing dark brown and no reflective gear or flashers. It’s just TOO dark (even with an almost full moon) to run in the dark near my house without a big flashing sign on your ass to warn the cars that you are there.

It’ll be interesting to see how it goes this weekend if I get the chance to run outside. How my body holds up.

So that’s it for me! If I don’t see you before – have a great weekend!

Thursday, January 12, 2006

elouai's doll maker 3
I don’t even want to post! But I promised myself that this year I would post the good AND the bad. Because the only way I’m going to make sure that when I stumble I do not FALL flat on my face in the mud and then let a few days trample over the top of me until I’m covered in it and it takes weeks to get it all out of all the cracks and crevices…

Uh – yeah well the only way to make sure THAT doesn’t happen is to post when I’ve been bad and that will feel SO icky that I’ll be back on it in seconds.

So, I overslept AGAIN!

We both did. I have no idea what’s going on with the two of us. We were in bed (and asleep) by 9:30 last night. Why are both of us so bloody tired?

Well as soon as we woke up this morning the fiancé looked at me and said – “That’s it! Bring your gym bag, we are going to the gym tonight. We have to work out in all that crowd as punishment for sleeping in.”

I didn’t get a workout in last night either. I ended up working until 6:30. Couldn’t grab a ferry until 7:20 which meant I didn’t get home 8:30. That left me enough time to grab some dinner and that was about it.

The good news is, food was PERFECT yesterday. Yep yep yep – I better be seeing some changes! ;)

Tonight the gym better look out because we’re hitting it! I’ve got a run and a back/shoulder workout on my plate. When my fiancé dropped me off he reminded me, “We’re going to go to the gym tonight, so be sure to eat enough today”

He’s such a doll!

On a totally unrelated and yet so pertinent thread…

Would you all think good thoughts for us? My fiancé has been working as a contractor for a while now. He’s got a chance coming up to get a permanent position somewhere. Not only will this probably mean more money, BUT it will also mean that we will feel secure enough to look into moving (and having to pay a bit more in rent). If this happens it means that I will no longer have a two hour commute. No more trying to drag my butt out of bed at 4:00AM! No more getting home at 7:00PM! No more excuses (not that I’m using those excuses now – it would just be nice to not have those obstacles to overcome) So say a prayer, light a candle, send good vibes, or just cross your fingers for us. He’s supposed to interview next week. This looks SO promising – but we’re trying not to get our hopes up TOO much!

Thanks!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Christie -

I just put my deposit down for the SF Phat Camp!

OMG I can't believe it!!

Jen's Phat Camp

Oooops

The Fiancé and I slept on the wrong side of the bed last night. That is to say, when we fell into an exhausted stupor, he was on the right and I was on the left, the opposite of our normal sleep mode. This meant that HE was sleeping on the side that the alarm is on. I was awaked this morning by him patting/shaking my hip and cheerfully stating, “It’s time to get up”

I looked at him blurry eyed and asked, “What time is it?”

He rolled over, looked at the clock and calmly stated, “Five Oh Eight”.

“&*^(!“

We have NO idea what happened to the alarm. I know I never heard it, and he doesn’t remember shutting it off. I disappointedly told him that I had ‘seven more minutes’ before I had to get up and went back to sleep. At Five Forty-eight he woke me up again. Five more minutes had turned into forty! Now, not only had I missed the gym, but I was going to miss my Ferry!

ACK!

So no workout this morning. I’ll figure out something for tonight though because I’m NOT missing! (Today is back day) Maybe I’ll do Bis and Abs today since they are easy to do at home and move the rest of my workouts over one day. We’ll see. I hate doing Back with pre-fatigued Biceps.

And now to the really geeky and probably boring part of my post (or maybe all of it is boring and I’m just deluding myself.)

Last night I sat down and started to REALLY crunch some numbers. Please, try and follow my train of thought here.

As we are all aware, I had my Resting Metabolism tested and it came back at 1788. Now if I modify that by an “Activity Level Multiplier” of 1.55* that gives me a Total Daily Energy Expenditure of 2771.4. For brevity sake and ease of calculation I’ll round that down to 2700. (Down because although I exercise 5 days a week, I do have a desk job and spend 4 hours sitting in a car/ferry every day commuting)

As many of you know – you need to burn 3500 more calories in a week then you consume to lose one pound of fat. 7000 if you want to lose two (a number that tends to be many people’s goal). That translates to 1000 calories a day. So, if I were to subtract 1000 from 2700 that means I would need to eat 1700/day to lose 2 lbs a week. That means daily eating AT or BELOW my Resting Metabolism Amount. If I were to eat that amount consistently, it only makes sense that my body would start to figure out ways to make me burn LESS. No wonder dieting fouls people’s metabolism up so much!

Anyway – My goal is to lose more like 1.75 lbs a week. To do that I need to drop my calories by 6125/week, or about 875/ day. BUT I’m still a little childish about my food and want to keep a free day – one that could easily reach my ‘maintenance’ amount of 2700 – so that means I’m only ‘cutting’ 6 days a week – and each of THOSE days needs to be lowered by 1020.

However, as we discovered above – cutting by 1000 puts me below my Metabolic Rate – something that’s not good. Not good on a DAILY BASIS, but, controlled it can be done. ‘Controlled’ means zig-zagging the calories. Now – I already have 1 ‘high calorie’ day planned because of my free day. I need at least one other – logically that would be Wednesday. That day I want to make sure that I get at LEAST my Metabolic Rate, and hopefully a bit more then that, So I’ll plan that day to be 1900 calories.

Monday is traditionally an easy day for me to go ‘low’ because I’ve just fed on Sunday. So that’s going to be a low day for me – 1500 calories. I also want to plan a ‘mini’ re-feed on Friday because as time progresses Saturdays are going to be my ‘long run’ so let’s make that day 1800.

That leaves three days and I’ll set those at 1700 each and be done with it. What does that looks like in simpler terms?

Mon – 1500

Tues – 1700

Wed – 1900

Thur – 1700

Fri – 1800

Sat – 1700

Sun – 2700

Total consumed = 13,000

Total burned (2700x7) = 18,900

Difference = 5900

That doesn’t equal the 6125, but I’m SO calling in the “I rounded down” card.

Really though, I think that’s the most I can expect to cut my calories and get away with it. If this doesn’t do it – I’m adding more cardio (just not running cardio)

What does all this mean and why should you care? It means that obsess WAY too much about this stuff. ;) It also means that if I’m going to do this I’m going to have to watch my calories and spend a lot more time planning meals than I like – cause I can’t just plan 1 meal for breakfast each and every day. It comes down to how much I want it. Right now – I want it! ;) it also means that I can’t be loosy goosy with my free day. That kind of sucks – but I’ll find ways to deal. Actually I could take a Friday Free day – but that means 1900 calories in cookies instead of 2700 (grin).

And why do you care? Well you probably don’t but I shared all of this in case some day – all this works, and I’m strutting around 130lbs 18% body fat and someone wants to know what I did – they can see not only what I did but my thought process behind it.

Have a fabulous week everyone – I’ll let you know how this experiment goes.

* 1.2 -sedentary (little or no exercise, desk job)

1.375 -Light exercise (light exercise/sports 1-3 days / week)

1.55 -Moderately active (moderate exercise/sports 3-5 days/week)

1.725 -Very active (hard exercise/sports 6-7 days/week)

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Guten morgen oder guter nachmittag depending on where in the world you may be.

Yesterday ended as well as it began. I really have to say that one of the things that gets me up in the morning is knowing that I can go home and immediately change into my satin P.J.’s without a guilty thought running through my head. My work is DONE for the day. All I needed to do was fix my dinner.

With THAT done – my calories came out a little light yesterday. 1700. This is a pattern that I have that I REALLY have to watch out for. I’m going to work on making sure they are higher today so that I don’t ‘bonk’ on my workouts or worse, set myself up for a binge. I had a pattern before where I would go several days of 1200 calories (or lower) for a few days – then one day I would come home, think I could fit a slice of pizza into my plan and before I knew it I had eaten 5 pieces! I was talking to my friend Marie yesterday. Telling her about my frustration with not losing scale weight and my plan to drop my calories just a ‘smidge’. The first thing out of her mouth? “Be careful we know you tend to eat too little”

(Check out THIS journal entry http://samsbfl.blogspot.com/2003/09/remember-slogen-i-believe-created-by.html)

That made me feel good because it reassured me that doing this this way, taking it slow and dropping my calories gradually until I figure out what works, is RIGHT for me. Then it will be up to me (and those of you who are watching out for me) to make sure I STICK to the plan and not under eat. Yesterday – well I can’t do much about yesterday but I can throw a couple of extra calories in today to make sure I refuel. Who knows I may just take up the suggestion I had to cycle calories each day – It does have it’s appeal.

(hmmm, digging out my spreadsheet)

Anyway – got to bed good and early last night. Man it was nice. 4:00AM still came too early but I dealt.

Today was Chest/Abs/and Cardio day:

Chest day is fun because it’s a day where I’m really going for some new personal bests. I like goals like these. So, first thing I did was hop on the treddy and start my run. A little warm up and then I was off at 5.0 MPR and 1% incline. I could NOT believe it. I managed to keep the pace up for the entire time (except for my planned walk breaks) . I even did my usual and REALLY pushed it on the last lap. 5.5 then 6, then 7 MPR on the last straight away. Whoo hoo! Finished the 1.75 miles in 22:05 minutes.

After that it was off to the gym. BTW – my Abs are SO SORE! I did an Ab superset on Sunday that really hit my lower abs, then heavy leg day yesterday and I was a hurtin unit today. I love it! Anyway – Chest ;)

Barbell Bench Press (+Bar): 80 x 6 / 80 x 6 / 80 x 6
12 week goal: 80 x 10

Now this was with a spotter but he SWEARS he wasn’t helping. Next week I may have him keep his hands off the bar unless I ask him for help. Then I’ll feel a little better about any progress.

Dumbbell Press: 50 x 6 / 45 x 6

12 week goal: 50 x 10

Fiancé had to help me with the last two of the last set – my chest was fatigued! He was a little put out that with Dumbbells I can lift the same amount as him (smirk) It’s only because he has a bad shoulder and his stabilizing muscles on that side need some work but it was kind of fun to tell him “Don’t put those away – I need them”

Decline Barbell Press (+ bar): 50 x 10

This was the first time I had tried this one. And I wasn’t sure how much weight to use – apparently 50 isn’t enough. Next time I’ll know

Then came the REAL test –

Cable crunches: 190 x 15 / 190 x 15

OMG was this hard – I wanted to quit at about 10!

Then it was off to the showers.

The two meals I’ve had already have been right on track. I’ve got meal 3 and 4 all set up. And meal 5 is the easy one – it’s at home. I’m going to slam dunk the day – you can count on it!

Monday, January 9, 2006

Ch-ch-ch-changes

So - if I'm going for 1800/day, Then I think it makes sense to change my intake to 5 meals instead of six. That will make each meal 360 calories (a comfortable level for me) and allow me to space my meals out nicely:

1 - 7:00AM
2 - 10:15AM
3 - 1:30PM
4 - 4:45PM
5 - 8:00PM

that 4:45 Meal means I have a nice full belly for the ride home - and the 8:00PM meal gives me an hour to fix dinner - just about perfect!
It's Monday - offical weigh in day.




Here's my to-day weight loss for the year. I'm going to try to keep this updated every week. I'm using my Wednesday Weigh in as my 'starting' weight instead of Tuesdays 'broken scale' weigh in.

So - today was 204. This means that in 2 weeks I've lost 1.8 lbs. Hardly the start I was hoping for. I know I said I would evaluate at the end of January - but I don't want to wait - dropping calories to 1800-1900 this week.

This is serious.

So - last night I did bis and abs. It felt good to know I honored my self promices and got it done.

This morning - well 4:00AM came WAY too soon. But I got my butt out of bed and did my thing. Amazingly enough I think it's getting *gasp* easier.

As you're aware, today is Monday. In my world Monday is leg day - whoo hoo!

Squat (+bar): 160 x 6 / 160 x 6 / 160 x 6
Leg Press/Squat: 520 x 6 / 520 x 6
Straight Leg Dead Lift (+bar): 120 x 6 / 120 x 6
Standing Calf Raises: 195 x 8/ 195 x 7 / 195 x 7

My answer to the Calf Raise problem - lower the weight, slow down the reps and do a few more of them - it worked. Whew my calves were screeming at the end.

Workouts for the rest of the week are:

Tuesday: Chest/Abs, Run 1.75 miles
Wedesday: Back
Thursday: Shoulders, Run 1.5 miles
Friday: Biceps/Abs
Saturday: Run 1.75 miles

I may end up throwing some extra cardio in there somewhere - something NOT running. LISS on the treadmill or Kenetics or SOMETHING. I want this weight OFF!!

I was looking at pictures last night from a few years ago. (I think December(ish) 2003) I was in the low 180's I had gone to dinner with my little sister - I looked at that photo and went - I want to be THERE AGAIN!!!



Not to STAY though. But at least get there!

Sunday, January 8, 2006

I got my last training run for the week done! yay! 1.5 miles in 19:09 minutes. I'm getting better.

the miles go up this week so it may be a little harder to keep the pace, but I'm sure going to try.

The good news is, I've given myself enough time, and I've planned my training in such a way that I'll be repeating this mileage in about four weeks. We'll see how far I've come at that point.

Have to finish bi's today. I relaxed a little too much this weekend - only excersize not food. so now I'm left doing it all at the last minute.

but I'm getting it done!

Saturday, January 7, 2006

 

As promised - a photo from Friday Night. Posted by Picasa

What's so funny?...

  Posted by Picasa
 


This beautiful young lady is my oldest daughter - she had winter formal this weekend. I keep thinking that one day some young man is going to look at her and see the beautiful, smart, funny woman that I do. Until then - she does darn good on her own. Posted by Picasa

 

Because I can't resist playing with the light and shadow Posted by Picasa

 

Lookout Lads - she's a heartbreaker Posted by Picasa

Friday, January 6, 2006

I slept in today (until 5:15) on purpose. Took the extra hour of sleep. Bis/Abs can happen on Saturday with my last run of the week.

Tonight I'm going out with friends to Karaoke and celebrate my birthday. whoo hoo! I'll post photos ;)

Thursday, January 5, 2006

I know we hear it 10-20 times a day, but how many times to we honestly answer the question, “How are you today?”

If I had to answer honestly here’s what I would say.

I’m tired. I’m an eight hours of sleep kind of gal and the past week I think I’ve averaged 5. Add on top of that that TTOM has arrived and I’m... well, TIRED.

Physically? Starting at the bottom. My feet have been feeling pretty good lately. Every once in a while I get a throbbing pain in my heal, but most mornings I wake up and walk half way across the room before thinking about the fact that I used to not be able to do so pain free. Now I hurt occasionally instead of with every step I take. Considering I tore my planter fascia three years ago, it’s about time! My calves are still VERY stiff and sore from Monday’s workout. It’s awesome to know that I worked those puppies GOOD. My quads and hams are doing well. They seem to have recovered nicely – I can’t wait to see what they do next Monday on leg day. Glutes – well they appreciate a good ‘sit down’ but again aren’t complaining too badly. Abs – whoa. I think it was the heavy leg day that did it because they have been sore since Monday. That’s cool – A little DOMS just motivates me. My back is a little sore from top to bottom – the good, achy, ooo I worked out kind of sore. My chest hurts to the touch and walking is a little uncomfortable due to the bounce factor – after every chest day my fiancé tells me he’s glad he’s not a woman for this very reason. My shoulders – well they are a mess. Sitting at a computer all day leaves me with tightness and tingles and pinches and numb spots. But through it all I can feel a little of the ‘good soreness’. And the ‘bad’ pain gets better as the weeks go by. My arms? Well they are a little ‘unbalanced’ at the moment. My Triceps are sore already from working out whereas my Biceps are waiting their turn tomorrow.

Mentally? I’m doing GREAT. Ten days in a row without missing a meal or a workout. Yeah! That feels good.

How are you?

Heh

So, yeah the alarm went off at 4:00AM this morning. At least I think it did. I don’t know I slept through it. My fiancé, however did not. (Have I mentioned recently how lucky I am to have him?) He bounced on top of me until he woke me up and made me get out of bed.

Once at the gym I wasn’t much better. I was DRAGIN’ I hopped on a treadmill for my run and immediately felt ‘out of it’. I tried to run my 5.0 MPR pace but my legs felt like LEAD. I ended up dropping the speed down to 4.5 and then 4.0 before I was comfortable again. I slowly bumped the speed back up to 4.5 as I warmed up. After 20 minutes I dropped it down to 3.5 for my ‘recovery walk’ and after that jumped it back to 5.0. My brain started saying, “This is hard, maybe we should slow down again.” “You’re tired, slow down.” I finally just said, “Stop Whining! You’re not so tired that you’re going to fall off and hurt yourself and until you are, I’m not slowing down!”

That did it. I kept the pace up for the rest of my run pushing it the last lap up to 5.5, then 6, then 6.5 then 7! – and finished in 20:11 MUCH better then I expected when I started.

I then staggered over to the weight area to do shoulders and tris. Shoulders is not my favorite day. But hey, they can’t ALL be my favorite can they?

Barbell shoulder press (+bar): 40 x 6 / 40 x 6
Dumbbell shoulder press: 35 x 6 / 35 x 6
Side Lat: 20 x 6 / 20 x 6

Tri cable pushdowns: 95 x 6 / 105 x 6 (I need to go heavier)
Tri kickbacks: 35 x 6 / 35 x 6
Tri Dip Machine (First time on this one – it was fun): 165 x 6 / 165 x 6 (again need to go heavier)

And, that was that! :)

Food today is on track. Should finish up right on target.

Wednesday, January 4, 2006

Note to self....

Lactos intolerant girls should not have two slices of EFL Cheese cake - even if DOES fit into thier food plan, and even if it IS their birthday.

I think I'm going to have to throw the rest of it out.

Color me green
Today’s been a little rough. But, I’m getting ahead of myself – let me start at the beginning.

I got home last night and was HUNGRY! I think I’m going to have to change my meal schedule being I don’t get home until after 7:00. I’m probably going to have to plan one more meal away from home and only dinner at the house. *sigh*.

Anyway – I got home and didn’t want any of the meals I had planned. Typical of me. Luckily I had some other things on ‘standby’ (one thing about doing BFL as long as I have – there’s a million recipes stashed away in my folder. Frankly, I was craving some spicy chicken stir fry. Problem. I had no stir fry veggies. But I went ahead and chopped up a pound of chicken. While I was looking around the kitchen I spotted some red potatoes sitting in the fruit bowl. (Don’t ask). So I sliced 3/4ths of a pound of those into quarters, threw them in a bowl with 1 Tbs olive oil, sprinkled some fresh thyme, dried rosemary, garlic powder and salt and pepper over them and stirred. (Ok so I put them in a plastic bowl, put the lid on and SHOOK them a bit) Then I put them in the oven at 425 degrees. (on a baking sheet of course! What were you thinking?) After that I dumped the chopped chicken into another plastic bowl along with a bunch of spices, (I doubt I remember them all) tarragon, caraway, ginger… ah I know there’s more! Along with a Tbs of Splenda, then put the lid on and shook all THAT up. I dumped what was left of some frozen veggies into a microwave pan, put a little water in and started in going in the zapper, then dumped the chicken into a pan with leetle bit of hot olive oil, and dinner was on it’s way.

Let me tell you, it was GOOD! And I resisted the temptation to nibble while I waited for it to cook.

After that I finished the night with a little EFL cheese cake (sans the strawberries cause mine had gone a little green – ug!). It was GOOD. And the day ended at under 2000 calories! Yay!

Still having problems falling asleep – it’s a PMS thing so I’m not too worried about it. Just makes it hell to try and get up at 4:00. I did it anyway.

The roads were clear today. I have to add that I feel a little embarrassed by the Kudos for going to the gym despite the flooding. You see – the gym is on the way to work. So I kind of HAD TO keep driving. :)

Since we both kind of ‘started back’ at the same time. My fiancé and I have started working out, together. Don’t get me wrong, we went to the gym together before, but we didn’t always do the same thing. But now we both do legs on legs day and chest on chest day etc. We alternate using a machine and do the same workout. This has caused some… problems. We don’t exactly have the same workout style :) But we’re working through it.

So today was Back – I like Back Day (I think I say this every day)
Bent Rows (+Bar): 50 x 6 / 60 x 6
Close Grip PullDown: 110 x 6 / 115 x 6
Seated Row: 120 x 6 / 115 x 6
Assisted Pullups: (paralle-grip) 170 x 10 / (wide-grip) 170 x 8 (I was so proud to do this!)

We were walking over to do Olympic style dead lifts when it happened. He said something that kind of rubbed me the wrong way. And instead of me shrugging it off that nasty thought ran through my head… “It’s my birthday, he should be NICE to me!” (Did I mention it’s my birthday today? No – well it is)

Today – I discovered something. My birthday is the only day of the year that I EXPECT certain things from people. I EXPECT that the world should revolve around me and that every person should temper their actions with “it’s her birthday”. It makes me MISSERABLE! So this stupid little thing (I’m sure enhanced by PMS) set me off and made me grumpy, then depressed… then grumpy again. We finished our workout but as my best friend used to say “our asses defiantly weren’t touching”

Olympic Dead Lifts: 45 x 6 / 80 x 6
Cable Crunches: 90 x 15 / 90 x 15

THEN in the locker room I got on the scale - The 'needs to be serviced' sign was gone and I was looking forward to having yesterday's weigh in afirmed. Um.. yeah. The nasty scale said 204.8. I was SO upset. Upset at myself for letting the stupid scale dictate my feelings. Upset that I had BRAGGED about getting down to 202. Upset that the sky was grey instead of orange (you ladies know what I'm talking about).

Of course fiance and I made up but everything piled on had left with very ‘unsatisfied’ feeling. Not BAD just… blue.

A DANGEROUS situation for a foodie like me. In truth, my brain was already binging, and I kept having to drag my brain away from the thought of ‘treats’. Of course the thought, ‘But it’s my BIRTHDAY’ kept cropping up and that didn’t help. But every time I caught myself thinking of things I shouldn’t I’d mentally change the channel. And every time that little kid whined about wanting a PONY I reminded her that the most wonderful present we can give ourselves is our self respect. I also went to my ‘compromise’ list of foods and had a Big 100 (a cravings buster for me) instead of my yogurt and Protein Powder I had planned.

As the day has worn on I’ve been feeling better. Focusing on my morning’s victories. Having the person who’s quickly becoming my 2nd best friend (My fiancé is my #1 best friend) do everything she could to make a ‘big deal’ about it being my day has helped. Also realizing and confessing this little ‘foible’ of mine has helped to clear a lot of the ‘blackness’ from my brain.

Luckily no one invited me to lunch. I knew I wasn’t strong enough to eat in a restaurant today. It would have felt really weird to say no.

So I’m good now. Drinking my water – eating the food I brought. No big plans tonight, but I’m fine with that. The ‘party’ (put together by #2) is Friday night…

And for those of you wondering… I became 37 today.

Tuesday, January 3, 2006

A little insite into my VERY Warped mind

Look at the opening line to an email I got...

BURN THE FAT, FEED THE MUSCLE (BFFM)
PRIVATE CLIENT LIST NEWSLETTER :: JAN 2006

You're looking at that and think.. Ooooo Kaaaay?

Well _I_ look at that and I read

BURN THE CAT, FEED THE MUSCLE

I think I need more sleep
Work today for some reason has been insanely busy. Here it is 12:00PM and I haven’t even STARTED on the things I had on my ‘to-do’ list much less finished them because of all the fires that had to be put out. Oh well, adapt and improvise.

I’m taking my lunch now so figured it was a good time to update.

Yesterday ended perfectly. Well, except for the fact that I had a REALLY hard time getting to sleep. I finally fell into a deep sleep at 1:30AM. Needless to say I was NOT a happy camper when the alarm went off at 4:00. I got up anyway.

I actually ate some breakfast before we left (unusual for me) and had a dose of creatine. We got out of the house in plenty of time – BUT… I don’t know if many of you have heard about this weather we’ve been having up here. We were on our way to the gym when we found out OOPS the highway is flooded and closed. BAH! We detoured around it but that added about 20 minutes to our normal 30 minute drive. So we walked into the gym late. Luckily, as many had predicted, there weren’t many people there.

Running 20 minutes behind it was SOOOO tempting to skip cardio. But, I didn’t. After stowing my gear I jumped on the treadmill and did my 1.5 mile run. Set the treadmill at 5 MPR and ran for 10 minutes. Then I walked for a minute before pushing it back up to 5 MPR again. Then the lead legs hit. I kept the pace for a bit but then had to back it down to 4.5. For the last .25 miles though I pushed it back to 5 and then 5.5 and then 6.. finishing at 6.5 MPR. So I reached my goal and finished the 1.5 miles in less then 20 minutes.

After that I went over to get my workout in. It was supposed to be Chest and Abs but I knew I was pushed for time. I also had a few ‘goals’ I needed to hit so I wanted to make sure I got THAT part of the workout in.

So here’s how it worked out:

Barbell Press (+Bar):
80 x 2 then 75 x 6 / 75 x 6
I don’t know what I was thinking here – I believe my goal was to do 75 x 10… but I started with 80 on there. But I did 2 with 80 lbs on there – 2 reps toward my goal of 10!

Dumbbell Press:
45 x 10 / 45 x 6
My goal this week was 45 x 10 – so goal achieved! Whoop

Dumbbell Flyes:
35 x 6 / 35 x 6

That was all I had time for. I’ll do pushups tonight as that’s one of my chest day goals – and abs since that’s something I can easily do at home.

Food is all packed and is on plan.

Oh! And I got on the scale at the gym this morning – weight 202!? Of course there was a big sign on the scale saying it was out of service – so maybe that’s completely wrong. I have to say I’ve been FEELING skinny lately and I’ve been SO good with my food. Didn’t even take a real ‘free day’ last week, had a free meal instead. (that comes from deciding to take a free day at about 4:00PM.. had already ate clean the entire day. )

Here’s to the new year!

Monday, January 2, 2006

Hit the gym rather late today because I didn't have to work.

OMG it was SUCH a mess! People EVERYWERE. As much as I love to see people taking control of their lives and getting into shape – there was still this nasty little voice in the back of my head that kept saying – Will you people get out of MY gym. The people who are REALLY there to change their lives don't bother me, but the gaggle of 20 somethings (sometimes standing in groups as large as FOUR around one machine) who were there to wave weights around and chat with each other really got on my nerves. Oh well, I won't seeing any of them being there tomorrow when I hit the gym at 5:00AM.

After a short warm-up I got ready to hit the weights – leg day! Whoop!

The 45 degree leg press was taken so I grabbed the other press machine. It said it was called "Plate Loaded Squat Press Machine" Pretty much like the machine I normally use but instead of pushing a sled along a track the weights are pushed using a 'levered' system. In the end I ended up using my normal weight so I imagine they are pretty comparable. Only this machine doesn't have any rails for me to smack my knee on. After a few warm up sets – here's what I did:

Leg Press: 500 x 6 / 500 x 6 / 500 x 6
Squats (+Bar): 150 x 6 / 150 x 6 / 150 x 6
Straight Legged Dead Lift: 110 x 6 / 120 x 6
Lying Leg Curl: 90 x 6 / 90 x 6
Seated Calf Raises: 90 x 6 / 135 x 6
Standing Calf Raises: 215 x 6 / 215 x 6

Pretty much decided I can't do standing calf raises anymore – they just KILL my back just under my shoulder blades – I'll have to come up with an alternative for these…


Food today was good - a little low in the calories but there are worse things it could be.

My meals are planned for the rest of the week. I'm SO ready and raring to go.

The workouts for the rest of the week are:

Tuesday: 1.5 mile run and chest/Abs
Wednesday: Back
Thursday: 1.5 mile run and Shoulders/Tris
Friday: Bis/Abs
Saturday: 1.5 miles run

Total miles planned 4.5

Happy Day 1!!!

Sunday, January 1, 2006

I took three whole pictures that I can actually stand to look at. Of course they are all of my upper body. *sigh* Ah well - I expect this to be the last day I look like this...

One this I LOVE about this photo is I actually managed to capture how awsome my shoulders are looking. check out my right shoulder (the one I'm not flexing) - oh yeah!

 
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And of course the obligitory front double bi...

 
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And a flex with a little dramatic lighting

 
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I'll be posting the 'standard' front/back/side photos at tracker.

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Edit: I added a link on my side bar that shows my progress calendar at body blog - you're welcome to check up on me now and then ;)