How much structure is too much?

I'm feeling fired up and motivated. Focused on do goals, positive power thoughts and the benefits of weight loss. As far as scale results... well still waiting on those but I'm willing to keep experimenting. Of course when feeling motivated and driven the urge to make a detailed plan with calories and macros and and and all those things is strong but I'm working on creating a lifestyle that can be maintained when I'm not running on this kind of high. I need something that works in winter and not just in spring. There are parts of 'intuitive eating' that I don't like ... Eating when hungry and stopping when at enough is great and I feel like that's how I would like to live my life in maintenance... but in weightloss it feels like that approach makes it hard to be a scientist. I don't like the constant second guessing myself... and it's not like I can wake up tomorrow and go.. oh yeah.. yesterday's food was at weightloss levels cause look, the scale went down. I don't know.. maybe if I was better at using a habit tracker I would have the data I needed to be truly scientific about my results...

There is one thing on food quality I want to work on - that is getting in more protein. I know it's good for me. I feel good when I'm prioritizing it in my diet and it's good for metabolism. again the urge to measure my protein intake so that I can better judge my success is strong. I think in this case... I need to do what's best for me and if I do (or do not) measure to like my reasons.

Another goal over the next few days is to figure out how to move more throughout the day. I work a VERY sedentary job and it is really easy for me to to sit for eight plus hours in front of the computer -- then go downstairs and spend another three four hours in front of the TV. I want to build a bit more movement into my day or at the very least STAND UP now and than. So, looking for strategies there.

in the good column (and I promised myself to celebrate more of my wins) My sleep has been really really good lately and water on point. So YAY!

one last thing - I really want to call out how helpful chatgtp has been for me. As someone who is easily distracted I can often lose track of what I'm going to the internet for to research. So I'll spend way too long going to 10 different sites that end up saying the same exact thing. what starts as a question in my head that could have been answered in five minutes will sometimes cost me two hours in lost time...

question of the day: What needs to change so that I look forward to doing what needs to be done?

Answer:  I need to change my thinking around those things that need to be done.  I need to think of them positively, and if not positively at least not negatively.

Getting specific here... What needs to be done? 

Drink Water, Sleep 7+ hours a day, Make a Daily Plan, Follow my Plan, Only eat when hungry and stop when satisfied not full.  additional things that I think are important are: lift weights and cardio

And from my coach/training chatbot: 

It's great that you have identified specific things that you want to work on to improve your health and well-being. Here are some tips for changing your thinking around these tasks:

Focus on the benefits: Rather than thinking of these tasks as burdensome or annoying, try to focus on the benefits they bring to your life. For example, drinking water can help keep you hydrated and improve your skin, while getting enough sleep can improve your mood and cognitive function.

Use positive language: When you talk or think about these tasks, use positive language instead of negative. For example, instead of thinking "I have to drink water," try thinking "I get to stay hydrated and healthy by drinking water." This can help shift your mindset and make these tasks feel less like a chore.

Celebrate your successes: When you do follow through on your plan, give yourself credit for it. Celebrate your successes, no matter how small they may seem. This can help reinforce positive thinking and motivate you to continue making progress.

Be kind to yourself: Changing habits can be difficult, and it's important to be kind to yourself throughout the process. If you slip up or don't follow through on your plan, don't beat yourself up about it. Instead, acknowledge what happened and refocus on your goals.

Constant?

 Today my page from https://primalpotential.com/ (100 questions that will change your life) asked me "Where could I be in ninety days of consistent action?"

I had the following response

90 days of consistent action would (I believe) put me back to where I was at the start of the pandemic. I would have 90 days of practice, 90 days of plans, 90 days of mindfulness that would build my toolbox out so that I can continue my weight loss journey through to the end. It would give me the confidence to continue 'figuring it out' And see me to a point where my body starts to really feel different. I'll be about 25% down from my original weight and that is enough that my brain actually starts to notice that weight loss has happened.

then I asked ChatGTP what it thought - many of it's thought echoed my own :D but I'm going to copy them down here to 1) embed them further into my brain and 2) have them in a place I can refer to them quickly.

With constant action over the the next 90 days, I could make significant progress towards my health and fitness goals. I would experience:

1. Increased energy and vitality: Eating nutritious foods and engaging in regular exercise can help boost my energy levels and improve my overall sense of well-being.

2.  Improved my physical fitness:  With consistent exercise, I would see improvements in my strength, endurance, flexibility, and other markers of physical fitness.

3.  Weight loss: 90 days of healthy eating and regular exercise would lead to significant changes in my body composition.

4.  Better Sleep: A healthy lifestyle can improve the quality of my sleep, leaving me feeling more rested and rejuvenated each morning.

5.  Increased self-confidence:  As I make progress towards my goals and develop new habits, I will experience a boost in self-confidence and self-esteem.

Yeah - all that is pretty much what I said but saying the same thing in two different ways really seems to help all the parts of my brain get on the same page.

So - here's another list of what I can expect.

1. Physical changes: I will notice improvements in my overall health, including weightloss, increased muscle tone, improved digestion and better sleep.

2. Mental changes: I will feel more focused, motivated and energized.  I will have a reduction in stress, anxiety and depression.

3.  Behavioral changes: I will develop new habits and routines that that support my goals, such as daily exercise, healthy meal planning and regular self-care practices.

4. Social Changes: I will experience positive changes in my relationships with others, as I become more confident and self-assured.

5. Financial changes: I will save money by reducing expenses related to unhealthy habits, such as junk food and alcohol.

Overall, after ninety days of consistent action, I will feel more empowered, confident, and in control of my life.  I will feel a sense of accomplishment and pride in myself for making positive changes towards my goals. 

----

I wake up feeling more energized and motivated than ever before.  As I look in the mirror, I notice my body has become more toned and defined.  My clothes fit better and I feel more confident in my appearance.  I no longer have to worry about feeling out of breath when walking up stairs or doing everyday activities.  I am proud of the healthy choices I have been making and feel a sense of accomplishment each day.  My relationships have improved as I have more energy to spend quality time with loved ones.  I feel more focused at work and have a greater sense of clarity and purpose in my daily life.  I feel happier, healthier and ore fulfilled than ever before.

Fulfilled --- Oooo I like that word! 

 I stepped back into action yesterday... as they say in NOBS BIG ASS ACTION

I made a plan and I made up my mind to work on sticking to it - as well as honoring my hunger signals.  

I had all the 'good thoughts' I was going to use lined up - I had a power thought for the day I was well rested and had a plan for water.  I was ready...

Last night while starting to fall asleep I started to think about my day.  I had this overall feeling of... let down, frustration, being 'on edge'.  And it had been with me all day.  My primary thoughts were along the line of 'today was hard - I felt 'off' all day.  I'm happier when I'm not trying.  Losing weight isn't worth it.

Primary feeling - defeated.  I fell asleep feeling defeated

Today I'm trying to work through all that.  I know these are exactly the feeling that have had me struggling for YEARS now.  This is my next major milestone in my jorney.

So, what actually WAS uncomfortable?  

1) eating slowly and mindfully at breakfast.  It felt like when I let the dogs outside and I have to watch to make sure the cat doesn't try to follow them.  Nothing BAD is happening at that moment, but I'm watching to make sure it doesn't.  I think the main reason is uncomfortable is because eating mindlessly is a habit.  So, slowing it down and THINKING about something that's automatic feels weird.  It's like when you notice your breathing and you try to breath normal using your 'thinking' brain instead of your 'automatic' brain.  There's nothing actually going wrong -- but somehow it feels like it is.  

So, I've noticed - I've normalized what was going on in that moment.  Next best? Can I just be uncomfortable for that 5-6 minutes out of the day while I process a meal and eating slower becomes the forefront habit? - Yeah, that sounds doable (and remind myself during the process that nothing is going wrong!)

2) Urges after breakfast.  I started thinking about food - not specific food but any food.  I told my brain to be quiet.  That I had eaten and there was no reason for food right then.  It was uncomfortable for a moment or two but went away... until.. about 15 minute later I realized I was actually hungry.  I ate the few bites left of my breakfast and all the urges went away... So, it was only uncomfortable because I'm still learning to judge my true hunger and enough signals.  I know this is an area I need work - and it's perfectly normal to work through this with some trial and error.

3) Dinner time - This was a double whammy.  first, I waited too long to start dinner.  I had planned something that required some work and I was already hungry.  BUT I wanted to wait for dinner - it was going to be so good!  AND I do think I have a habit of snacking (nibbling) while cooking.  So, while I was cooking dinner it was urge city! A few times I gave in too - nibbled on some spam left out from breakfast and then I beat on myself a little - "You shouldn't have done that! You'll ruin dinner!" 

So, yeah it's normal to want food when you are hungry.  It's normal to EAT food when you are hungry.  Maybe better planned stacks and better food timing helps here? but it was never an emergency.

So, yes... I'm going to continue this work.  I'm going to keep listening and talking to that part of me that losing weight scares - the part of me that doesn't trust the other part of me to take care of us.  Trust will happen it will just take time and I'm going to keep reminding myself that everything is ok and it's going to continue to be ok. 

 Was listening to a MJ call over the weekend and she told a caller who had been 'stalled' for quite some time that 'you are only 2 bites away from weight loss'. That has been rattling around in my head for a few days. I find I want to bounce from eating how I am now to only eating 1/2 my meals and planning only 'best' foods and than back to doing nothing at all. I'm not yoyoing in 20 pound swings like before NoBS but I'm not losing weight either.

So, today while I was on the treadmill I started thinking about eating less. As I said, my process before was to either 'cook less' and/or 'eat half'. I knew I didn't want to take away one of my eggs in my standard breakfast because I had done that before and that wasn't enough and left me hungry... but I started to wonder. What if I actually tried leaving bites behind? ... My logical brain started to argue with me and said.. wellllll how must IS two bites? So I invented a new game that I tried with breakfast and it worked! even better than I expected!

Instead of 'bite behind' I 'skip bites' Twice while eating breakfast I would pick up a bite of food and than 'skip' putting it into my mouth -- I would set it to one side of my plate instead (I might change this to a small side plate or bowl.. we'll see). This let me leave those bites behind, but ALSO made me much much more mindful while I was eating. For 'set meals' like my eggs and or my sandwich that I've had over and over again it cuts out all the drama of 'should I stop now?' 'how about now?' AND some part of my brain thinks I ate all of my food.... cause I actually picked up my fork the 'normal' amount of times. It was weirdly satisfying. Can't wait to try it again for dinner and lunch!