Happy Halloween!
I've actually taken four days off - in a row. I think my body might have needed the rest. I am SO ready to head back to the gym. Tomorrow's my appoitment with my trainer - since most 24 hour trainers seem to be used to working with people who have never stepped foot into a gym before - this should be interesting. I'll either end up being really impressed - or highly amused. I at least have the BMR test to look forward to!

I feel like such a failure right now. I'm so dissapointed in myself! My fiance hasn't been going to the gym with me recently because he's been working an insane amount of overtime. So this morning, I shut off the alarm, rolled over and snuggled with him instead of getting up and hitting the gym. I know - it's not the end of the world but dang it - working out was the one thing I've been getting RIGHT lately. Missing is like a slap to the face. I don't want this change in my habits to be just a 'flash in the pan'. I'm scared to death that in a month or two this blog will be quiet again, and I'll be back to making excuses for why I'm not getting things done. Making excuses at 4:15 in the morning why it's OK to turn off the alarm and stay in bed just seems like the first step in that direction. It frightens me and makes me really sad.

On top of it all I let the stress get to me at work and I caved while walking past the bakery. I grabbed a choclate roll (like a cinnamon roll only filled with chocolate chips instead) for my #4 meal instead of eating the Protien shake I had planned on.

I think that's pleanty of 'slipps' for a while. time to get back on track and back on course.

Monday is a 'planned' day off from the gym. I'm going to enjoy halloween as it's the first the series of my three favorite holidays. Dressing up is not an OPTION it's a requirement.

Tuesday I'm not going to get my 'normal' workout in because I ACTUALLY signed up to meet with a trainer at my gym. I'm also supposed to get my BMR tested. I'm acutally kind of excited about that one. BUT I can't drink any diet soda all day - and I can't workout... BAH

So, I'm going to have to hit the gym this weekend so I don't shrivel up and blow away. Heh, yeah that's gunna happen.

I think I was FINALLY able to capture some of the changes I see happening with my body right now! I got some excelent pictures...

One of my favorites.



And if you look closely at this one I SWEAR you can see my bicep 'peek'

Let's see, I think it's about time for an update.

The weekend went great. I ate on plan and rested. That was the easy part.

Monday was good too. I ROCKED my chest workout. Seriously – I'm sore today and that hasn't happened in a LONG time.

Flat BB Bench Press: 70lbs (+ the bar) x 6 / 75 x 6 / 75 x 6
Incline DB Press: 45 x 6 / 45 x 6 / 45 x 6 I think one more week at 45 and I'll be ready to go up to 50! I'm so excited.
Flyes: 25 x 6 / 25 x 6

Food was good all day yesterday as well. Feeling really good about that.

Today was legs and I rocked that as well.

Squats (used the smith Machine today) 140 (plus bar) x 6 / 140 x 6 / 140 x 6
A guy came over while I was finishing my warmup on these and asked if he could 'work in' I said SURE and he added 50 lbs to the 90 I already had on the bar. He did his set and then started to take the 50 lbs off. You should have seen his face when I said 'no leave it'. I love when that happens.

Leg Press: 140 x 6 / 150 x 6
Standing Calf Raises: 225 x 6 / 235 x 6
Dead Lift: 110 x 6 / 110 x 6

I nearly screwed myself on deadlifts. My grip was slipping and I thought I would 'hitch' it up a little. Well my hands didn't like the 'hitching' the bar started to slip and I ended up catching it with my thigh.. OUCH!

But I didn't do anything more then bruise it a little. Next time I'm going to try an alternating grip and see if that helps.

Food today – was going ok, until the girl next to me brought a HOT FRESH Chocolate Chip cookie and set it on my desk.

BUT that was the only 'off plan' thing I ate – and I subbed it for my afternoon meal. So I don't feel THAT bad about it.

Tomorrow it's back at the gym and shooting for another clean day.

Ok - maggie at Pink Dumb Bells made this for me and I just HAD to share it! It's so awsome and so inspiring for me...

In one year this will be me!

Someone posted a link on my blog the other day. Normally that’s something I delete, but this one didn’t seem to be the typical ‘spam’. One there was no lame comment with it to try and make it seem like a ‘real comment’. Secondly it was just a link – not someone trying to make a buck by filtering me through their ‘link account’. So it was a link to a program called “Peer trainer” I read through the literature and it sounded pretty good, then I checked the price and WOW it was free. So I sign up. Basically it’s a way for people trying to lose weight or get in shape or train for something specific to form groups and support each other. You’re asked to log your training and meals. If you don’t log in for more then 7 days in a row… you’re deleted. You can form your own groups or join one already formed – and you can send little messages back and forth with your group. All good stuff. No GREAT stuff. The more people who hold my feet to the fire – the better.

So, I sign in and set up a group. But since no-one is going to ‘join’ my group right away I look around and spot another group that’s formed that has some space so I join. Here’s where it gets kind of funny. You see – I’ve been doing BFL or some form of it for hmmm 3 years? Of the last four books I read on weight loss three were Body For Life, Burn the Fat Feed the Muscle, and The ABS Diet. Every ‘weight loss board’ I’ve visited during that time (body for life tracker, pink dumbbells, bodyblog, lean & strong) has people on it that are the same. My idea of a ‘diet’ has included 6 meals that include a protein and an carb for so long that I’ve forgotten that other people don’t eat that way. So – I’m looking through the food logs of my new ‘weight loss support group’ and I see THIS as a meal plan:


1 banana


tuna sandwich


grapes
8 oz lowfat strawberry yogurt
raisins


corn flakes w/ banana

I almost turned around and backed out the door – But, I think I’ll hang for a while. Maybe I can be some kind of an example… And what the heck – just because they don’t eat the way I do doesn’t mean they can’t be supportive.

Anyway – back to me. Yesterday ended just fine. I actually ate 2000 calories but I’m happy with that – I think I’m going to have to back down the calories a little slower then I had intended because frankly yesterday – I was STARVING. When I get hungry like that I get scared – scared that I’m going to dive face first into something really bad for me. Better to eat 2000 in clean foods then to fall into plate of cookies and end up eating 3000. So, today I’m going to aim for 1800 – 2000 again. Funny thing is – just logging my food for these two days – I’ve lost weight. Yes – you heard me right I’ve FINALLY gotten below 204! Whoop!

My workout:

2.25 miles on the bike (15 minutes)

Arnold Press - 30 x 6/ 30 x 6 / 30 x4
Military Press - 60 x 6 / 60 x 6
Lateral Raise - 15 x 6 / 20 x 6
Upright Row - 60 x 6 / 60 x 6

And, lastly I actually liked the way my arms were looking in the mirror at the gym today. A lot less ‘dimples’ that makes me happy.

yesterday was great... I even entered all my food into fitday which I have now decided is a MUST for me. No more whining about not having 'the time'. It's required. Yesterday ended up at 1800 Calories - 200 less then the day before which was my goal.

I didn't want to get up today. Finally made it out of bed at 4:30 which made me 1/2 an hour late for the gym. :dry: Luckily my routine is fluid enough to allow me to adapt. I did arms and skipped abs - I'll do them tonight.

Today's Arms:

Straight Bar Curls (total weight): 50 x 6 50 x 6
Single Arm DB Curls: 25 x 4 20 x 6
Cable Curls: 60 x 6

Cable Bent-over Tricep Extension: 50 x 6 50 x 6
Cable Pushdown: 90 x 6 90 x 6
Dumbell Kickback: 25 x 6

Today I'm going to shoot for about 1600 calories and see how it goes - Everything is looking good so far!

-Shawn

First off.. I had an epiphany...

it started like this. I logged my food for yesterday and realized that I had eaten about 2000 calories. I think yesterday was a pretty typical day for me of late. So I'm pretty safe thinking 2000 (with a generous free day) is close to maintenance for me. Then someone asked me (thanks browneyedgirl) what I ate when I lost weight before. Due to the fact that I don't throw anything away, I looked through all my old fit day records. I found two good months where I tracked my weight and entered my food intake rather consistantly. I found that I averaged 1500/day one month (August) and averaged 1.75/week loss. And 1300 another month (September) and averaged 1.32/week. (I don't really know how my workouts went during that time).

What's funny is I know for a fact that my weight loss stalled in October - guess what else changed in October? I stopped logging my food! There is NO DOUBT in my mind that this has happened EVERY TIME I stop logging. I stop losing!

Funny how stuborn I can be. I insisted that I didn't need to get up in the morning and workout. I would be just fine doing it in the evenings... and yet, my workouts were consistantly spotty. I get a gym membership - and start working out in the mornings and *poof* I have only missed one workout in two months...

Now I discover the 'truth' about food as well. I eat a LOT more then I think I do - Yeah I can maintain when I self regulate, but to cut - I need to TRACK. Do you hear me - ME? I NEED TO TRACK TO CUT! enough said.

lastly - I'm glad to FINALLY find someone who agrees with my scale habit...

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2005/10/16/national/a135009D80.DTL&type=health

there is no doubt in my mind that when I stop weighing... I gain (or at least I've gained when I bother to go back and check again)

I'm glad I could be right about ONE thing this weekend.

So, how have things been going for me?

Well my workouts have been fantastic. I changed to the Max-OT training program 1 – because it’s 5 days a week, and I LIKE lifting 5 days a week 2 – because it’s quick and leaves me time to do cardio every day and 3 – because it lets me lift heavy and I REALLY like lifting heavy. I’ve completed a week.

I’m still getting up at 4:00AM to hit the gym – and loving it. Ok – I don’t love getting up at 4:00AM but love hitting the gym enough to live with getting up at 4:00AM.

I think food is going ok. I feel like I’m eating healthy 6 days a week – but I must still be eating ‘too much’ because I don’t seem to be losing weight. This is so frustrating. I was expecting October to be the start of something big. Total weight loss so far? .6 lbs. Honestly I can say that I haven’t ‘tried everything’. It’s becoming more and more plain to me that I need to count calories. However, the time involved in making that happen is daunting. I guess I have to decide how badly I want this. There’s a part of me that wants to say… just keep doing what you’re doing. You’re healthy, what more do you want? Stop beating yourself up and live. But there’s the other part of me that’s not willing to give up the dream. That’s not willing to settle for ok. So, I suppose I should pee or get off the pot…

On a positive note – I’m getting ‘scary strong’ (as some people like to put it).

I’ll post my current Personal Bests on each exercise tonight so I can track progress.

As a plan going forward – I’m going to continue to read the “Thin Commandments” to get a handle on my cravings, and I’m going to re-read Burn the Fat Feed the muscle. AND I’m going to plug some numbers into fitday. I’ll how it goes.

Yesterday ended just fine. The only deviation from the plan was that around 6:30PM I was STARVING and I was still 45 minutes from home, and probably and hour and a half from having dinner. Soooo I picked up a protien bar and had it instead of the ricotta I had planned for desert. No harm, no foul.

Actually woke up at 3:58 this morning. BEFORE the alarm - wierd. I'm feeling tons better and I'm actually off the decongestants now. Still stuffy but 80% well. I hit the gym by myself again. I'm pretty proud of myself for continuing to go when my workout partner sits at home in bed, nursing the SAME COLD I have Oh well...

It was a shoulders day and that means Arnold Presses at some point. When it was time I went over and grabbed my customary 25lb dumbbells and went to work. As usual I notice some of the guys giving me sidelong glances and after I had finished one of them came up to me. "I can't believe you're doing that!" he tells me, and then "I can only do have that much weight and it KILLS _me_". I had to laugh and told him "It just takes practice". He meant it as a compliment and I took it as such... made my morning it did!

Workout:
Close-Grip Pull-Up (assisted): -190lbs x 15/-170 x 10/-170 x 10
One Arm Row: (30lbs x 12)x3
Front Lat. Pull Down: 75lbs x 15/80lbs x 12/90lbs x 10
Arnold Press: (25lbs x 10) x 3
Shoulder Press (Db): (20lbs x 10) x 3
Lateral Raise ss w/Bend over Lat Raise: (15lbs x 10) x 2


So - food's on track for today - lunches are packed. I ended up SUPER hungry after breakfast so added a protien bar. I may have to recalculate my calories and make sure I'm having enough. Hunger is BAD if I don't want to go off on a big ol' bar of chocolate...

Three days with no diet pepsi. If I make it through the week I may allow myself some on my Free Day... we'll see.

Yesterday ended well - except my fiance has caught this cold thing that I've been fighting. Unfortunatly he doesn't have the fortitude or constitution that I do and he's down for the count. Luckily we planned last night. I asked him "Are you going in the morning?" and made him commit to me right then. When he said no, I mentally prepared myself for having to go on my own. Honestly it was easier knowing last night then it would have been to find out at 4:00AM when I'm at my weekest.

So, the alarm went off this morning and I was up and out the door by myself. No, it wasn't as fun but I did it anyway. I got my 20 min HIIT in and then spent another 10 minutes walking. Then I did ab boot camp and my stretching. Overall considering I feel like I've been booted in the head, it was a good workout. Funny thing is, once again I found that when I got to the gym I forgot all about being sick and just did what I needed to do.

Oh - and I got over a gallon of water in yeterday and didn't have any diet pepsi. I haven't had a diet pepsi in over two days! Maybe I'll kick the habit for good this time...


Breakfast: Shake/protien pancakes
2nd Breakfast: Strawberry Protien Shake
Lunch: Steak and beans
Snack: Protien pudding
Dinner: Stir Fry Turkey
Desert: Rocotta cheese 'cake' w/fruit

Yes, I know it sounds a awful like like yesterday's menu but hey - I've don't have a lot to work with here

Besides fighting a stuffy head I kept feeling HOT all day today. Not feaver hot, but just a LOT warmer then I usually am (I'm usually a pretty cold blooded person) Then, as the afternoon wore on I noticed I was having heart palpitations. I was sitting here trying to figure out what was going on when it dawned on me to check out the sinus meds I was taking. Hello - Decongestent - Pseudoephedrine... Hot Flashes and heart palpitations the same reaction I got while taking regular ephedrine. This was a LOT less sevear but I also haven't been drinking any caffein. There goes my (very very brief) thoughts of maybe perhaps trying ephedra again now that it's back on the market. NO WAY I want to go through the scare I had before and I certainly don't want to be back in the hospital.

Guess I have to lose the weight the 'old fashioned way'

Still in allergy HELL, if it really is allergies. I just know my head is stuffed up, my eyes are watering, I’m sneezing. But it’s all in my ‘head’ so I keep working out.

Yesterday I tried to sleep in. I guess when we get up at 4:00AM during the week, 9:00AM IS sleeping in. I got up and grabbed some more meds then had a nice breakfast. Right after I ate I ended up curling up in my comfy chair with a blanket and dozing off for about an hour. It seemed to help. After my nap I got up and made ALL my lunches for this week. Goal – ACCOMPLISHED. The only bummer was that I don’t have a lot of money this week and so I couldn’t afford to go out and buy all the food needed to follow the ediets menu. So I had to make my own meals and enter them into FitDay. It’ll do.

After that I changed my clothes and went out to do my cardio. I still wasn’t feeling 100% and literally had to FORCE myself out the door. If you’re thinking I would start to feel better after getting out and walking under the beautiful autumn skies – you would be mistaken. I still felt like crap. I got to the track and started to run. The first lap was horrible. I was struggling to keep going and felt like I was having to gasp for air. By the time I finished that first lap though I had fell into a nice rhythm and was a lot more comfortable. Laps 2 and 3 were ok… I kept a steady pace and managed to keep my head up while I ran. On the last lap I was feeling it. I was trying to pick up the pace a little but felt like I wasn’t getting anywhere. When I made the final turn it was like I was running through water. I tried to ‘kick’ it out the last straight away but it still felt like a bad dream where the nerves were firing but the legs weren’t moving. I finished the mile in 12:58 minutes. Just a hair under 13. I’m SLOW. Seriously, people walk faster then I run. *sigh* I finished up the other ½ mile of my workout walking around the track. Back the house I did my four, yes you read that right FOUR pushups and then showered and rested some more.

Food wise I didn’t eat too much because I wasn’t that hungry. No, seriously… Stop Laughing… are you done now? Ok – I don’t know if it was the meds or the stuffiness or what but I just wasn’t feeling like food. I ate when I was hungry but didn’t have anything ‘good’ because I just didn’t feel like eating it. Even Ice-cream and chocolate had no appeal. Weird.

Oh yeah! I drank over three liters of water and didn’t have ANY diet Pepsi. And I’m not suffering. Yay! (is there caffeine in decongestants?)

I got to bed early last night and slept rather well. It was a little bit of struggle to get up this morning. Still feeling crappy but not nearly as bad as Saturday or Sunday. Once I was up, though I was wide awake and in a relatively good mood!

By the time I hit the gym I was almost Normal (which by the way I’ve noticed twice in a row now – feeling like crap and then getting to the gym and forgetting that I’m supposed to be ‘ill’ – hmmmm) I warmed up and then started my leg workout. Today I did:

Leg Press (Single Leg): 70lbs x 15/(90lbs x 15) x 2
Leg Extension: 70lbs x 15/(70lbs x 10)x 2
Stiff Legged Dead Lift (Bb)(My all time favorite): 30lbs x 10/50lbs x 10/70lbs x 10
Lunges (Barbell) (60lbs x 10) x 3
Standing Calf Raises: 135lbs x 15/135lbs x 12
Bicep Curls: 25lbs x 5 & 15 x 7/20 x 10 & 15 x 2


I’m still sick, but feeling so good about my exercise and food plan right now. Almost (dare I say it) Charged up!

Oh – and no diet pepsi today and I’ve had 128oz of water already today. Decongestants make me feel SO dehydrated.

I woke up this morning in misery. My head was pounding, sinuses blocked, and my throat hurt. I stumbled around a little bit and then turned to my fiancé and asked, "Are we going to the gym today?" I was so proud of him when he said, "Yeah, that way we have all day tomorrow to recovery." I drank some diet pepsi (yeah I know…) took some aspirin and drank my No-xplode. Before too long we were changed and headed out the door. I help abate my misery we stopped at the drug store and picked up some Clairton. I also picked up a protein bar because - even if it wasn't on my plan – I needed something on my stomach. A few more drugs and two small bites of the bar and I was ready.

The workout was GREAT. I couldn't believe as horrible as I had started out the day feeling I was charged up and ready to go when we hit the gym door. As soon as I sat down on the bike to warm up I knew it was going to be a good day because the line in my upper arm was back and my delts were popping! It really is the little things that keep me going!

Today was Triceps and chest day.

Triceps Pushdown: 60lbs x 15/80 x 12/90 x 10
Overhead Tricep Extensions (cable): 50lbs x 10 & 50 x 8/70 x 10 & 50 x 6/70 x 12 & 50 x 8
Tricep Bench Dip: 13/15
Kickbacks: 15lbs x 12/10lbs x 12
Incline Bench Press (Barbell) 30lbs x 12/30lbs x 10/40 x 10
Incline Bench Press (Dumbbell) 30lbx 12/35lbs x8 & 20 x 12
Cable Cross Overs: 40lbs x 12/45 x 12/40 x 10

My arms were so DONE by the end of this.

We left the gym and then ended up stopping at Target on the way home. I picked up two sports bras on clearance – Love when that happens. AND a crock pot. Dinners just got a whole lot easier.

By the time we left Target I was so hungry I was feeling sick – on top of just feeling sick. So we ended up stopping at Carl's Jr. I picked up a grilled chicken sandwich plain and took off the tip bun. I had that instead of the chicken parmesan – so I was still on plan.

When we got home I showered changed and then just vegged on the couch. All the rest of my meals were to plan, AND I drank 3 liters of water.

I still feel like crap, but I feel like I had an excellent day! Even while being sick I still stayed away from the French fries at Carls and didn't have any of the chocolate my fiancé brought home. All in all – a great start to October and I can't wait to see what changes come in the month to come!

Tomorrow's goals/plans:

Free Day! Whoop.

Plus I'm going to see how many pushups I can do and see how fast I can run a mile. All fun stuff.